I wanted you

I wanted you. 
I wanted you so bad I did so bad it hurt,
Hurt more than a graze.
Then a bump, 
More than a scratch… than a lump, 
A cut, 
It hurts so much there is no scar to see, 
Nothing showing upon my knees, 
The impact you see is quite clear, 
That the damage is on the inside,
It’s so severe, 
Severe it controls the things I do, 
The words I write, 
And say to you, 
The damage spreads like black ice on water.
Your sins …sing me to sleep, 
Your frozen palm shush me a lullaby, 
Like a toddler that’s met defeat, 
Bloody puddles of the tears I weep, 
Cover my toes and feet, 
Get me out before I scream, 
Why can’t you just be, 
A distant memory. 

I wanted you.


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