1 night turned into 3 week stay.
This was no holiday vacation
Whole summer trapped inside Womens screams oxygen tanks knocking and equipment bashing
How people work here is beyond me it’s a strength no one mentions.
Midwives don’t show much emotion on their face
Recycling bin blue uniform of midwifery wear flashes in corners of my eye from the hospital ward room door
Red button is there but told only for absolute emergencies
They are short staffed and have little time
This has now become my concern
Rules must be reminded and remembered
High white blood cell count provides further evidence to why I shouldn’t have be discharged
So they say as if it was me that discharged myself
Envious infection wants to rip me down and kill me unless loneliness does first.
It’s mid July and people ask if I am tanned but it’s jaundice skin
For three weeks I have been told I am mentally unstable and pains are phantom
I need to get a grip and care for the new infant
I am sick
This is 2018
Partner abandons all responsibility to defend and respond to my needs
So here I lay in paper thin hospital nightgown families come and go leaving with their precious bundles,
Balloons and greatingcards
women in fresh new jogging pants or summer dresses hiding previous bump
Staff ask where he is what time family are about to visit
Family feuds and selfish behaviours prolonged recovery
Slickly stealing my dignity in being a woman and a mother
In glazed eyes they see only themselves during my suffering.