I made my bed
I left the kids asleep
I thought about the end
And who I would write this letter to
I was left shut out in the blue
And I wrote down your name
And I wrote down the places
My feelings and changes
The things that really got to me
Like you saying I’m selfish
I’ve been killing myself over and over
My head is split
You criticise me say I’m acting irrational
But you tell me things that don’t add up.
Your words don’t match your actions
Your actions make me feel more afraid
And come the day
Things won’t ever be the same
So I wrote this letter
I put on the lamp
And I sat in the corner of the couch
I thought about why and what
I thought about the conversations that we had
I almost read the whole book you gave me
The 1st one
But it’s not like it matters now?
Because you’re clearly treating me as if I’m no one.
You’re clearly treating me as if I’m anonymous
And I’ll watch you move on with your stupid games
I’ll watch you play them with her
Whilst I’m shut out in the blue
I’ve lost a whole circle of friendships too
Whatever we had
My personality dripping down the kitchen tap
And at the time this was enough to end it all last night
Enough to end it all.
Enough to call the shots.
To turn off the camera light.
But I’ve got a better plan.