Poems for the unknown

sometimes its a day dream

You Fucking Broke my heart: Letter 1

Letter 1

S.Street

Hull

Dear stranger,

I was walking earlier down the street, couple of tears.

Nothing I couldn’t cover up and beat.

I imagined you being civil, oh how sweet that could be, you sat down on the bench.

Sat down next to me.

You pulled up the bottoms of your trousers, even though your tall, that shouldn’t really bother you…your black dirty boots slam with force to the floor.

The pavement is under us.

The bus shelter is smelly and there’s chewing gum on the bench,

I’m trying to think right despite all the stench.

Your bright yellow t-shirt, I fucking hated cleaning them, and your stupid fucking cap with your greasy hair from the vents.

We sat and it was silent like the world had finally given us a chance.

We didn’t need to get violent, or fall back in love and dance.

We needed solidarity, a solution, something that would both make us content.

Whether

that

would

happen,

I don’t know,

but we can try,

Better

yet.

I needed to tell you,

I waited like some kid like I did with him,

don’t blame me,

I was raised on fairy tales,

dreams

and

the ability to hope.

I never learnt how to cope.

but

As soon as you think its a lecture,

you stand up to walk away from the truth,

I guess, I thought we was even,

since you enjoyed smoking dope,

something that helped you.

the ability to cope?

^

Imagine that this bus stop,

isn’t in the place that you think,

its in the middle of a field,

no bus lane,

no smoke

no lies

just cuddles and a cry.

^

For one last fucking time…

things could have changed,

they did change,

they changed in a blink,

I wish,

I didn’t have to speak,

in riddles and twists,

but you Fucking Broke my Heart,

it’s strange….

I thought it was already broken,

I felt you take it,

from me…

…..P.T.O

 

Pillow 2015

Pillow  2015

 

Your presence makes me      a b s e n t 

And my tears fall on silent     ears

For years you never said a      thing

You didn’t                                                                        complain

Now I see you used me for your own

GAIN

When all I wanted was

 

 

 

Calm

 

 

 

 

 

 

All I yearned for was a peaceful     a  r o  m  a

 

I’d curl into a                       ball

Grip tight the                             pillow

Call after                                               call

Redial after                                                redial

For you to

 

DECLINE

 

I didn’t mean to bitch or                                                                  whine

I just needed you to

 

 

 

LISTEN 

 

 

 

But my tears fall on silent ears

 

And for years my

hunger, 

was never

satisfied ,

my fears turned into your

lies,

and I’d die

just to feel

 

ALIVE.

 

weed

you can try and rip me out the ground

but my roots are spoil deep,

tangled
twisted

weaving

through the mud. 

pull me apart bud by bud,

my power is stronger than most flowers above,

I spread and lurk along the Bush

and yeah I may not end up plucked,
and in  your mother’s vase,

but I will take the broken mug,

and you may think im just a freak

just because my blends unique.

one day I will be just as big as a tree,

large almighty towering over

he

he wont ever see that im enough

mush me into dirt and muck

think there’s nothing left to regrow

but I even come out when there is snow

and I will flower and I will grow highier and highier

my roots dig deep

no shovel will make me weak.

pulling

a zip.
a tie.
buttons, clips, unopened, sealed, unspoken,
you look at me,
and then you see,
me come undone.
shoe lace knotted over and over,
draws jammed, morning shower,
water pours over my youthful skin,
pink and full of life,
change my life?
you say half the battle is almost won,
you look at me,
I come undone.
age defined my naivety,
but when your around me I feel the gravity,
food up high, on shelves near by,
fridge flourishing with fruit,
the sun it shines,
on to my hands,
you look at me,
our journey has begun,
I come undone.

Soul mate

It seems like I’ve known you a long time

Longer than the time that’s been mine

I don’t like to wait like I’m in line

And I’m sure when we meet it will be just fine.

*

It’s nice that your unique

I like it

Don’t let no bitches take from it

Don’t let noone give you shit

Or leave you toxic

Your energy is magic

Some people are fake and I don’t trip on that shit.

*

Don’t need no moons or stars to complete this 

This feeling is something

Bliss

And I’ve been searching and holding out for so long

To find someone like you to get along

Belong

Hold on

Your my journey

We will go places

Go further

Page turner

Thank you for being you

Thank you for being true

It’s hard for me to open up too

And I hope we can build on something new.

 

It’s ok

It’s ok, to not feel ok

It’s ok, not to be ok

It’s ok, that your not feeling alright

It’s ok, that your feeling lonely tonight

It’s ok, if you doubt everything you do

It’s ok, if you think you’ll never be the better version of you

It’s ok, to feel like you won’t ever get back up

It’s ok, if you feeling like you’ve had enough

It’s alright, don’t worry, I will reassure you

Don’t panic, it’s safe, where we are right here

Take shelter with me

I could tell you things and repeatedly tell you until you believe.

Why won’t you believe?

That it’s ok you don’t have to do this alone.

All the words I wish you told me when I put my foot back through your door.

I wanted you

I wanted you. 
I wanted you so bad I did so bad it hurt,
Hurt more than a graze.
Then a bump, 
More than a scratch… than a lump, 
A cut, 
It hurts so much there is no scar to see, 
Nothing showing upon my knees, 
The impact you see is quite clear, 
That the damage is on the inside,
It’s so severe, 
Severe it controls the things I do, 
The words I write, 
And say to you, 
The damage spreads like black ice on water.
Your sins …sing me to sleep, 
Your frozen palm shush me a lullaby, 
Like a toddler that’s met defeat, 
Bloody puddles of the tears I weep, 
Cover my toes and feet, 
Get me out before I scream, 
Why can’t you just be, 
A distant memory. 

I wanted you.

 

Tell me

Tell me

is her colour as pretty as mine?

Tell me

does her hair have a silky shine?

Tell me

do her lips feel as soft?

Tell me

is she sexy when she is cross?

Tell me

does she smell as fine?

Tell me

or am I wasting my time

what is it that im doing wrong?

Tell me

maybe im a fool and we don’t belong

Tell me, tell me, tell me

cos right now im not feeling so strong…